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WHEN THE HEAVENS SMILE (Aki Senoo)

If you feel that the saying ‘variety is the spice of life’ also applies to shounen-ai school stories, here’s something that covers a few food groups on that particular plate. We’ve got strawberries, ghosts, horny librarians, alcoholism, poorly whistled renditions of ‘Scarborough Fair,’ depression brought on by cell phone novels, and of course – a proper staple of this kind of diet – a school roof blow job. Where else would you get the protein? (!)

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DOUBLE TROUBLE (Takashi Kanzaki)

I don’t think I’ve read an English-licensed yaoi yet title with a true threesome in it, unless this glass of Cabernet is just affecting my memory at the moment. There are certainly a lot of titles that tease at it but never deliver, often just for fanservice and never intending to. But I can’t recall another book – besides this one – that basically writes a threesome into the plot as the resolution, mentions it multiple times as something all three characters want and plan to do, and then when it’s about to actually happen, the curtain closes and there’s no final act. It’s not that the ending is bad, it’s that there isn’t an ending at all. I couldn’t believe this story was complete, such was the abruptness of this. It’s so absurd, that I feel the need to warn people beforehand. The gleeful, malicious cackle of Lady Blue Balls echoes strongly with this one.

Thankfully, there’s a lot I liked in this sexy school comedy that somewhat made up for it, in the sense that you were promised a slice of cake but given a few stale Oreos instead but you just really want something sweet so whatever.

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NAUGHTY BUT NICE + SPICY BUT SWEET (Naduki Koujima)

Shotacon and non-con are like cheese and chocolate. Some people think they shouldn’t be mixed at all, because it tastes gross and makes you feel gross. Some are warmer to it but definitely think there’s a real art to accomplishing it in a way that makes it tolerable much less enjoyable. The third group is spraying Cheez Wiz on Hershey bars as we speak while calling groups 1 and 2 politically-correct pussies in between chews.

The first group probably shouldn’t bother with this series, but it might as well be a Sunday School book to the third group, who think ‘Boku no Pico’ is shit because it’s mainstream shota. That leaves the second group, who will be largely divided because for many palates, the mess of cheese and chocolate mix in here is not always the tasty kind.

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DOUBLE CAST (Mamahara/Mizuhashi)

Rival actor co-stars getting it on is up there on my list of favorite yaoi plots, shortly behind high schoolers getting it on, hi FBI nothing to see here, guys in period costume getting it on, business/work rivals getting it on, and powerful fantasy kings or demons getting it on. You can’t say I don’t have diverse tastes, I guess.

As far as the rival-actors-turned-costars theme, Double Cast doesn’t quite do this as well as Hero Heel or Embracing Love, but it’s still a solid entry in this category. The story is a good mix of salacious and sincere, such that it satisfied my inner trashy gossip mag fantasies without reading like one.

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PET ON DUTY (Nase Yamato)

So quick reader poll, when going down on a guy for the first time, what’s the first thing you should do?

A) Lick their balls
B) Eat their ass
C) Bite their frenulum
D) Give them a Lion King (Flip them over, fuck them from behind, and pull out and come on your hand – when they turn around to see what you’re doing, dip your thumb in your semen and rub it across their forehead while whispering, ‘Simba.’)

Guess which one our uke Mizuki here chooses? Not D, unfortunately, but that’s my favorite thing I’ve ever read on Urban Dictionary.

He actually picks C. Guess it doesn’t seem all that weird now compared to the last choice…

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CONSTELLATIONS IN MY PALM (Honami/Sakuragi)

I seem to be on a Honami kick right now. I apparently just happen to be reading the books she drew in an order where I like each successive one more than the last. No doubt this pattern can only last for so long but I was curious to see if I’d find my new favorite book of hers at the end of the trail. It might be too early to say, but this one is going to be hard to top – Constellations in My Palm is not only my favorite book Honami has worked on (the 5th of hers I’ve read), it has one of the most touching, beautiful, and tear-jerking stories of any yaoi I’ve read in a long while. Really, it’s that good.

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THE INCREDIBLE KINTARO (Naomi Guren)

I may or may not have gotten this title just to review it. And holy fuck am I glad I did. ‘Speechless’ is a word that often gets attached to a greater number of things than it’s truly worthy of describing, but I think this manga checks that box.

Things That Grow and their Practical Applications: The Christian Summer Camp Middle School Reader, 6th ed.  (alternate title idea) 

VERY NSFW pictures after the jump, even by BL standards.

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